I ducked.

One would think that having a new kindle2 and going to a book group would mean a show-and-tell. Alas, not the case. I had brought my kindle, in its gorgeous ultrasuede cover, but it stayed in my purse.

We even talked about kindles. Someone brought them up, someone else mentioned a Seattle Times article than "panned them." The career bookseller was pleased to hear that. (It didn't, not really.) Her livelihood is at stake. But most people had never seen a kindle and no one had seen a kindle 2. One person mentioned that a little wistful. But I was too chicken to get controversial. Little did they know they were about four feet away from one. The negative things they said about the kindle? Most of them weren't true.

Face it. Kindle or its competitors will change bookselling. And in some ways, it's about time. Sorry about that, but times change. There will still be a market for bricks and mortar bookstores, for real live booksellers, at least in the near future, but the times are changing.

• Like holding a book in your hands? Well, actually I don't. I find my hands hurt after too long holding a book open. And some books are heavy and awkward to hold. A kindle is like getting ergonomic bars on your bicycle. All of a sudden, many other hand positions are available and no more cramping.
  
• Multi-tasking. I like to knit, but that cuts into my reading time. I thought audiobooks would be the thing, but they aren't always appropriate. I can read a children's chapter book (big print) and knit, as long as the spine is already broken on the book. With the kindle, my reading while knitting options open up wide.
  
• No backlight? I love the fact that it doesn't have a light! It's easy on the eyes, easy on the power consumption, all around a win. I am fine with greyscale. Color is over rated.
• Weight of books. Several people mention being able to take lots of books on vacation, not running out if the plane is delayed. I also see this as the future of textbooks. My teen's backpack is lethal. There's no reason he should be carrying around all that weight all day. (sure there are lockers, but not enough for everyone and not enough time between bells to utilize it anyway.) Just think if all or most all textbooks were e-books. A savings all round.
• Formatting pdfs and blogs and newspapers. So it's a work in progress. I downloaded the free sample first chapter of my graduate school Algebra text to see how it handled the symbols and it was fine. I haven't tried a knitting pattern yet. I expect some will be frustrating, some might be fine.
  
• Not being able to share or resell books? I suspect that's a work in progress as well.
  

Carbon footprint? Saving paper, of course, but it does cost resources to make the e-reader. Saving trucking costs getting books to stores. Just thinking textbooks alone: My son carries at least 10 pounds of textbooks every day. So, 10 pounds by one million kids by 5 mile average round trip commute is using fossil fuels to carry 50 million pound-miles every school day. Account for absences etc and say 150 days a year. How much gas does it take to move 3.75 million tons of weight a year? (note, my numbers are very back-of-envelope.) I know laptops were supposed to be the end of carrying heavy backpacks, but that hasn't happened. I like that the e-reader has limited net access. I don't want a full bells and whistles browser, because I don't want the distraction and temptation. It's not going to happen tomorrow, but it will happen. And sooner than some suspect. Now I just have to get up enough nerve to admit my purchase to diehard book fans. I'll think about that tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day.

Grow Up, Young Man!

Maybe we should read the classics more often.

Book group last night. Six women. Five questions of "Why is this a Classic?" and "Why do we have teens read this?" (One woman arrived late. But she wasn't asking those questions anyway.)

Most said they didn't really understand the book until they realized how depressed Holden was. Another woman brought up bipolar as I considered, but really, I don't think we can say bipolar to be exact, but Holden is seriously depressed and having a manic episode. Very depressed, very out of control. So the ending is bleak because, given the time and culture, there isn't much hope of him getting proper treatment. Someone mentioned the self-medication with all that alcohol. Without proper treatment -- that's going to come right back.

So why do we have high school kids read this? One woman -- the one who brought up the bipolar and self-medicating -- said that she had read it as a young teen and thought then it was an adventure story. Hmmm. Just like Huck Finn is an adventure story. There's a thought. When the American Character group discussed Huck Finn recently, many were struck by how challenging it would be for teens. That the themes of race and the characterization of Jim were so brutal and needed perspective. Many were also struck by how awful Tom behaved. Tom in popular culture is not such an awful bully and brute; he's a fun kid who likes adventure! I don't believe in censoring books to kids, but I have often gotten uncomfortable when kids are reading books as adventure stories but missing --- on the surface --- the book's darker themes. Are they absorbing themes without consciously evaluating them? Think Jane Eyre as a romance, even though if today our BFF were involved with a Rochester, we ought to be very worried for her.

We had a lively discussion. One woman had researched themes on the internet and another woman bought the Spark Notes. Wow, often we discuss a book for all of ten minutes! These women were serious last night, they wanted to understand, to think! So a theme that resonated the most was that Holden really does not want to grow up. His ambivalence about sex, his issues with "applying himself" and on and on. Sure, this would resonate with teens, this does make for legitimate reason for teens to read it. Teens are ambivalent about growing up. Independence comes at a cost. Holden seems to have had a decently affluent childhood, but then his younger brother died and he gets sent away --- as all the boys of his culture are --- to boarding school, a brutal existence with no adult protectors. When he was young, no one protected him. Now all he can think of is to protect children. (Hmm, Ender's Game)

Is it all about sex? Sparknotes would have us believe that. In a way, probably. Everything is about sex. Holden is immature in some ways, but actually seems pretty mature in other ways, in conflicting feelings about wanting sex, but with whom? Sex with someone you like --- but do girls want it? How do you know when a girl says no because they mean it or because they want it but want to be able to deny that later? Or sex with someone you don't like? That's easier, but harder. He sees his peers following this route without compunction --- just one more way in which everyone is a phoney.

I get that he wants to save kids. I get that he wants to keep them from falling off the cliff. The most vivid scene I remembered from my reading as a teen (the only scene I remembered) was him trying to erase the "Fuck You" grafiti from his sister's school. I took it on the surface, just protecting kids. But big themes go further, he wants to protect kids' sexual innocence. Is it just about sex? (ah, the joys of high school. the one woman who said they read it for high school said they never mentioned sex.)

Well, he does take those two young boys to the mummy exhibit, even though he knows it will scare them. And maybe this explains the carousel pony on the cover of my copy. When Phoebe is on the carousel he comments about how kids will attempt to get the brass ring. How it is dangerous for them to attempt this but how we just have to let them do it anyway. Then he goes home and gets help.


I am struck by how yesterday I was stuck in the depression angle. Then discussing the book, we started with depression but were able to move on and appreciate many different aspects of the book and Holden. While acknowledging the depression, we were able to view Holden's journey apart from it. Unlike the protagonist of many children's and YA novels, Holden has two parents. Two relatively normal parents. So for his journey to make sense, it comes with a different cost. I just wish I didn't get the feeling that the book says that growing up requires mental illness. Or maybe I just wish that idea didn't resonate with me so much.

America is still a pretty young nation. Are we still wrestling with growing up? With sexual maturity? Does a bear shit in the woods? This book then seems awfully prescient, given how the 50s and 60s played out.

Go West, Young Man.

Another question about Catcher in the Rye, is why did the book group facilitator (an emeritus professor of literature) choose this book as part of a series on American Character?

On one level, the answer is trivial. Holden Caufield is considered a quintessential American Character. A teen, 50's, boarding school, all popular topics. Many people know of Holden even if they haven't read the book. But is that the reason enough to include it in the list?

I suspect there's a bit more than that. I don't think it's an accident that Holden ends up in a psych ward in California. Just like Huck Finn & Jim, just like Jack Burden in All the King's Men, he doesn't fit in civilization and looks West for salvation and a place to call home. We never know if Huck and Jim make it. Jack lies around Long Beach, creates his own god -- The Great Twitch -- and goes back East where he belongs. Holden? What has California to offer him? What he needs is family, connections, support --- as well as professional psychological help. All he wants to do is save kids, but who will save him? California does have his brother, but only for an occasional visit. It doesn't have his sister Phoebe who probably needs Holden by now as much as he needs her. California implies that Holden is the problem and he can get fixed in isolation. California for therapy, chosen by his parents. How is it different from Holden's plan to run away to California, get a job pumping gas and pretend to be a deaf-mute?

Did Salinger mean to allude to Twain? Or is it just burned into the American psyche to look West to follow your dreams. Are we all a bunch of misfits out here?

Why a duck?

I have no idea.



I was planning to use some cut-up thrift store cashmere sweaters or other stash fabric to make a protective case for my kindle 2. But while I was at the fabric store this morning on an errand for Franz and was browsing the buttons, I stumbled upon the ultrasuede squares* and knew instantaneously that my kindle's case would

• be made of ultrasuede
• be made of these exact colors
• have a duck on the cover
• not just any duck, the duck from the duck stencil Zach had when he was a preschooler.
  

Even though I hadn't actually seen that duck stencil in years and wasn't even sure we still owned it.

We do have the stencil. Before committing to it though, I browsed stencils and images on line. How about a nice elephant? They never forget and could hold tons of books in their trunk? Or a goose? Y'know, Mother Goose-ish? Oh, then I found a really cute owl. But no, none of those would do, it had to be a duck. This duck.

*They are called ultrasuede squares even though their dimensions are 9x12 inches.

Why is this a classic?

I just finished reading Catcher in the Rye, for perhaps the third time. I'm in two different book groups that are discussing it this month. Convenient for me. In one book group, we read children's and YA literature. We read a lot of newer work, but occasionally go back to a classic or two. The other book group is more erudite --- It has a theme. This year's theme is The American Character. In neither case did I have any say in choosing this book.

I really disliked the book the last times I read it, but couldn't have told you why. I found the ending so depressing, so hopeless. This time, I enjoyed reading the book. I liked the voice. I was surprised. But then, at the end, I realized why I disliked the book in the past, why I thought the ending was so depressing when other people seemed to think it was hopeful.

Here's the thing. The book is not what most people seem to think -- a teenage rite of passage, a teen facing the normal angst of growing up. The book is a first person account of a psychotic break. Manic break, I would say, but I am no expert. The signs point to mania though. Many hours without sleeping or getting tired, staying awake even after consuming a lot of alcohol. Grandiose thoughts, poor judgment with money. The hallucinations near the end when he is afraid of falling every time he steps off a curb.

Because the person having the psychotic break is a teen, because that teen is intelligent and aware and empathetic and all that, it looks like a teen event, and because he is so articulate, it looks like something readers can identify with. But it is not a teen event. It is a psychotic break from reality. You don't treat them the same way. And it's not really his first break. When his brother died, he slept in the garage and used his fist to break all the windows. And he tried to break the windshield of the car, but by then his hand was broken. So, he got hospitalized to fix the hand, but no one seems to have considered that the fractured bones were not the problem.

That's the reason I find the ending depressing. He's not being treated as someone mentally ill, he is being treated as someone who needs to grow up, to "Apply himself." That's different. He's not going to get better that way. I don't know the state of medical diagnosis and treatment for bipolar disorder or even serious depression in the late 40's early 50's when the book was written. Electroshock? Worse? We don't even have an avuncular Judd Hirsh to give us a Hollywood moment and make it all better. Holden, hater of Hollywood that he is, would have declared that phony anyway. He'd been right.

Plans

A friend just asked in email what I plan to do next week, since the teen is off school. Last year at this time we went skiing in Utah, but this year nothing nearly so exciting. As I was thinking about my list of things and what to reply, I figured this was a great opportunity to say Hi to the blog. Hi, blog!

My plans:

• Nag the teen. He must
  

1. Finish Application for next year's school dream
   
2. Do homework
3. Figure out his LA Honor's project and get cracking
4. Work on two Merit Badge requirements
5. Practice the horn. Solo & Ensemble recital is just around the corner
6. Make dinner one night and do other various chores
7. Complete paperwork on service learning hours he's accomplished so far. He needs 60 to graduate, has turned in Zero, but has actually done maybe 15. Can't get credit if he doesn't fill out the forms.
   

• Prepare the budget for a volunteer board position I've held way too long. (My term is up in December 2009!) This should have been done already. It should have been done this week, but instead the computer has been busy running thorough scans and removing viruses, thanks to the teen.
• Watch eBay. That's my first edition/first printing signed copy of Twilight. Stephenie Meyer came to All For Kids on her very first tour; we were her very first audience. There were maybe a dozen girls and women present. Our buyer really liked the book, thought it would sell, but it was hardback and brand new. We had to scramble to get the dozen people to come so the room wouldn't be deserted for this novice author. My how things have changed! Last time she came to Seattle, she talked at Benaroya and tickets sold out in about a half hour. Erika is a dear and listed it for me, as I have never figured out how to sell things on eBay.
• Nag the teen. Make him show me his application essays.
• Knit! I'd kinda lost the knitting mojo, but a knit-blogger I follow started talking about her group challenging themselves to knit a dozen sweaters in 2009. Vests and short-sleeve tops count as well, as long as they are sized for adult. It was just the challenge I needed. I had some sweater quantities of yarn in stash, plus I had my eye on some new yarn. As much as I wanted to help stimulate the economy, I could not justify yarn shopping if I wasn't knitting. I have three completed (photos below) and two more in process. Details on my ravelry projects page.
  
• Nag the teen. Remind him that merit badges are earned, not gifted.
• Take the teen to his ortho appointment.
• Provide ibuprofen and soft foods for a couple days.
• Nag the teen to practice the horn even if his mouth hurts. The recital won't wait.
• Knit some more. Maybe some lace, something different than sweaters.
• Read! I have looming deadlines for two book groups. All the King's Men and Catcher in the Rye both need to be finished in two weeks and I haven't started either. (If only I had a kindle, would make knitting and reading simultaneously much easier.)
• Consider signing up to purchase a Kindle if the eBay auction is a success.
• Try to avoid reading the news. This never works though, I can't help it and end up reading all about how bad the economy is and why and what's not being done to fix it. As someone who'd been following Krugman and CalculatedRisk and other smart, logical, rational folks, I knew this all was going to happen, but it doesn't stop me from being pissed off at everyone who let it happen.
• Maybe I should also start working on the taxes. Won't that be fun!
• Get caught up in Lost. We haven't watched any of the new episodes.

Too many holes.

Caution. Minor HP spoilers ahead.

I used to work at a leading independent children's bookstore, owned by an energetic mover and shaker in the world of selling children's books. Therefore, just about any author of children or teen lit on tour would come to our store and I met a lot of them. I never met the author whose name rhymes with bowling, she only toured for her first book and that was before I started my job. The boss and manager had dinner with her way back then. Thought she was a nice woman and that her book had some potential.

I did meet, twice, a nice young woman whose name sort of rhymes with Hay Shears. On her second book tour, I had a chance to chat with her before her reading. I wasn't trying to be mean or anything, but sometimes I ask questions without thinking them through. I was trying to be sympathetic to the challenges of writing when I commented on (one of) the continuity errors. As she developed the characters and found it would really help to tweak the past, she must have had to wrestle with the editor? How did an author decide to change facts from book to book? She gave me a deer in the headlights look and asked what I meant. Well, I said, one of the main character's grandmother lived in one state and had had limited contact with her grandkids over the years. In the next book, grandma lived in a different state and the grandkids had (until a few years ago) spent significant parts of their summers with her. No. She had not realized this, nor had the editor caught it. Oops.

One European author who is popular abroad didn't need to tour the US so I haven't met her. I got to read the galley of her second book (second published in America that is, riding on the reading wave sparked by Ms Rhymes with Bowling) right after it arrived at the store and it was a good read, but oh dear, the climax of that book had a glaring error. At one point, two people are locked in a building as two other people leave. The building is being watched; any activity would have been noticed. Then someone sets fire to the building so as I was reading I was worrying about the folks trapped inside. Well, the author wasn't --- somehow they ended up somewhere else. The galley had a very friendly note asking for comments, so I very helpfully emailed the editor. I hoped this could be caught before the final version was printed? I got a polite thank you, but I don't think anyone actually read the email or else didn't care. The book was published just like the galley. Did anyone else ever notice, I wonder? (props if you did. let me know.)

Ms Rowling has written seven books with the same characters. Seven! She's done an admirable job overall with continuity within and between volumes. So consistent that I could forgive occasional lapses, such as the fact that at the end of one book, Harry has lost his Marauder's Map to someone not inclined to give it back. However, at the beginning of the next book it is back in his possession. And the lack of internal consistency on whether or not apparition makes noise. And on and on, actually. There are lots of continuity errors, but I've been willing to forgive them. Overall the books have been good stories with decent consistency.

I finished Book Seven and enjoyed it. Didn't like the epilogue. Really didn't like the epilogue. But my husband thought perhaps she wanted to stress that these folks lived regular ordinary boring happy lives and therefore she was Not Going To Write About Them Anymore. I also noticed in chapter one a squat man with a wheezy giggle who was on the Dark Side and who took special delight in the fact that the Ministry had been infiltrated. Who was he? Was he in the Ministry? JK is usually good about following up on these sorts of clues, so I expected him to reappear. Two short men with high pitched, wheezy voices did appear: Elphias Doge and Deadalus Diggle. Which one was an agent for evil? What would happen to the Dursleys? Well, nothing was said again. I was irked. But oh well. Easy to forgive. And no one else I have talked to found it troubling.

This weekend I decided it was time to restart Book Seven. I had memorized the edging pattern for Leda's Dream and figured I could knit while rereading, to see if I was justified in being irked about the anonymous short wheezy guy and maybe I would understand the whole Elder Wand thing better. But on page one, I started thinking about chapter one and the rest of the book and a huge plot hole became apparent. A quick check of a scene near the end of the book confirmed it. I was stunned. I was furious. How could such a major glaring error in time sequencing have been allowed?

This is perhaps the straw that breaks the hippogriff's back. I am surprised at myself for my reaction but I am really pissed off. Does anyone else know which error I must mean? Am I overreacting?

Victorian Shawls and Novels

Knitting:

I will have two FO's soon, the Sea Silk Shawl and a mini-clapotis. Sea Silk just needs the last row knit and then the bind-off. Clapotis is long enough to start the decrease section, so I have to either find the instructions that I printed off or reprint them again.

After that, my backlog of projects will only (!) be five sweaters and Dulaan hat number three to finish, and knit hats four and five to complete my promise.

I am not in love with Sea Silk. It is slippery and has no give so it is hard to knit, looks pretty, but not so pretty to justify the expense. And when it got tangled, it fused together in nasty lumps which makes me suspect it will pill terribly. I don't yet know how big the finished shawl will be, not till it's off the needles and blocking, but it won't be big enough to qualify as a real shawl in my imagining.

So, even though those sweaters are all sitting there trying to make me feel guilty, I am dreaming of knitting a real shawl. Something very big, at least 72 inches wide. Something soft, perhaps with mohair for extra softness. Something warm, but also something very feminine, soft flowery lacy pattern of some sort and a silk content for a sheen. Still contemplating patterns, and will work on the sweaters until a shawl pattern and yarn grabs me. To that end, I have ordered Victorian Lace Today. I think I'll find something appropriate there.

Reading:

Although she remained a lurker and didn't respond to my Jane Eyre question in the comments, Nancy the English Lit PhD gave me some insights into Jane from modern feminist theory. (Nancy has not read Jane Eyre in years and gave me a simplified explanation which I most likely am misinterpreting, though.) Bertha Mason symbolizes the repressed female sexuality in Victorian times, how she is in some ways Jane's alter ego. Too much libido got women locked up in loony bins. I can see that, but I also think that Jane is not all that repressed. She does want a sex life. But she is not willing to have a briefly fulfilling sex life that might ruin her long term happiness (Rochester's improper proposition) nor will she commit to a sex life that won't be fulfilling at all (Rivers' marriage proposal). And the message about too much libido is a warning to men as well as women; Rochester's giving into his horniness pretty much screwed his chances of lifelong happiness. He had to lose his eyesight and a limb in order to redeem himself and win Jane. Probably a fair trade. Rivers denied himself his horniness and ended up feeling fulfilled with his life. His words to that effect end the book. Is Charlotte's message really for men, in telling them they cannot "have it all"?

I've ordered Wuthering Heights; figured I'd see how Charlotte's sister's view of men and women and sexuality compares. Will Heathcliff be as flawed and creepy as Rochester? In the meanwhile, I went back to the other Jane, Ms Austen. Mansfield Park. It's pretty good so far. What was Jane Austen like in person, I wonder? In her writing, she is such a snarky lady, every paragraph holds a zinger.

Rochester v Rivers

I stayed up way too late last night finishing Jane Eyre. Although I knew the basic plot line, this was the first time I've read the book. I was left with one big question. What did Charlotte Bronte intend for readers to think about St John Rivers? He gave me the creeps. I didn't get the charisma, but he certainly had some sort of charismatic sway on Jane. It felt artificial though, since I didn't share in it. Is that just because the author didn't do that good a job portraying that creepy (psychopathic) charisma or that times have changed and her readers in 1847 would have been drawn in? I did get the insidiously creepy psychological abusiveness. Jane didn't. On one level she was able to hold her ground and continue to say no to Rivers, but it was a close call. She almost acquiesced to his demands even though she knew he would kill her. Those were her words. I don't think she meant he would physically kill her, but he would certainly kill her soul and lead her to an early physical death. But even throughout the psychological abuse, she defended him as a great man. What did Ms Bronte mean by this? Did she want us to see him as the twisted nasty guy apparent to my 21st century eyes? Or did she want her readers to accept him as Jane declared, honorable and worthy? Maybe she constructed him simply so Jane could experience the polar opposite proposition as what Rochester asked? And as a symbolic plot device, he doesn't come across as fully fleshed out, three dimensional?
I don't know enough about Victorian society to figure it out. Guess I better surf the net for clues.

My week

• Snaked the bathtub drain.
  
• Contemplated getting hair cut short to avoid that chore again.
  
• Mowed the lawn.
• Almost fell for Google's April Fool prank.
  
• Knitted on but did not finish

sea silk triangle shawl

green pullover sweater (EZ meets Pippa)

mini-clapotis in angoravalley Lacewing


sleeves for fibonacci sweater

• Renewed car license tag on-line.
• Found out I had waited to long to have it mailed to me before current tag expires.
• Took bus downtown to pick up car tag. Spent $2.50 in bus fare because I refuse to pay $4.00 to have the tabs sent to a local agency.
• Treated myself to latte and muffin downtown.
  
• While downtown, went shopping and bought myself new underwear. It had probably been 10 years since I bought underwear. I can now get hit by a car without embarrassment.
• Took car to shop for 90K check-up.
  
• Vacuumed car. Helped put roof box on car.
• Arranged temporary stop of newspaper, mail and milk for next week.
  
• Arranged foster care for Tasty Chicken for the week.
  
• Looking forward to a week of car-camping in SE Washington, emphasis on Washington State History and geology. History because it is a state educational requirement and we are homeschooling history. Geology because geology is fascinating and Washington's geology is visibly fascinating.
  
• Logged into checking account at credit union about two dozen times looking for IRS refund.
• Once the refund arrived, wrote checks for and mailed mortgage and property tax bill.
• Finished a marathon Harry Potter reread of all six books.
• Inspired The Nerd to reread them also. He's also finished.
  
• Discussed same with The Nerd and hypothesized about Book Seven.
• Tutored math at The Nerd's middle school
• Found out that he got into his first choice high school, even though for the upcoming school year, it has the longest waiting list of any Seattle public school ever. Very relieved.
  
• Found out what a close call it was. District uses a distance tiebreaker. This year, the boundary for enrolled vs wait-list was 1.81 miles from school. Mapquest puts us at 1.79 miles.
  
• Updated alumnae email and snail mail addresses for upcoming 30 year high school reunion
• Started searching airfare prices for Fall trip back East.
  
• Discovered that waiting a week to purchase airfare for reunion increased the cost by 35%
• Found out that by flying into Baltimore instead of Dulles, I could reduce airfare back to original estimate.
• Purchased ticket. I'm confirmed to attend Reunion and my niece's wedding on East Coast in October. Just me. Not going to disrupt high school attendance in the first semester.
  
• Started thinking about what shawl/stole/wrap I should knit for the events.
• Took The Nerd to an open house of a youth kayak racing club.
  
• Passed a Float Test at a local pool. I only needed a renewal if I want to take another sailing class which is a long shot. Really I did it so The Nerd would have company taking his float test, necessary to take a sprint kayaking class. Float test: wearing long sleeves, long pants, tread water for 9 minutes, then put on life jacket while treading water --- not as easy as it sounds but there's a trick that helps. Nice lifeguards share trick.
  
• Signed The Nerd up for the beginner sprint kayak class and braved Spring Afternoon Greenlake traffic getting him there and back again.
• Walked around Greenlake for the first time in years. Anyone free on Tues or Thurs at 4 PM and want to walk the lake with me? (starting April 17th)
• Rest of today will be packing, organizing, grocery shopping for trip. We leave tomorrow morning. Fort Vancouver here we come.
  

Tales from the City

I can parallel park better than my husband. I considered this for the list of weird things about me, but it really isn't that odd. I grew up in DC, started driving at 16 and hung out in trendy Georgetown. I got good at parking. Preferably with the zippy compact VW Rabbit, but sometimes I got stuck with the VW Bus. I got way beyond simple rules such as "when the steering wheels are aligned start the turn..." because hello! cars vary and the steering wheels are in different locations relative to the length of the vehicles. Can I articulate what I do? Nope. Could I guide someone while I was seated in the passenger seat? I've tried, but is it my fault they won't listen? No. My husband, on the other hand, learned to drive while living in the burbs around L.A. Land of driveways and parking lots.

Neither of us owned a car when we started dating, but once he borrowed a car to take me out. Someplace with limited on-street parking. So after driving around a bit with me saying "there's one," and him saying "that's not big enough," I timidly suggested I might try one of these too small spots. He was impressed. Good thing he's not too macho to admit it. He tries, but he still is trapped in the simplified rules and just doesn't understand how when he follows those rules and lines up the bumpers or steering wheels just so, the car refuses to go where it should. Instead of arguing over how the rules don't apply, if a trip will require parking skill, I drive. My high school and college find-a-spot-weekly-to-have-fun years turned into the Chicago find-a-spot-daily-so-I-can-get-home years. Therefore while I still have the magic touch, I've used up my quota of tolerance for the hunt. More than five minutes driving around to find a spot and I'm a complete grouch.

Franz saw that author Jennifer Ouellette was speaking at Elliot Bay Bookstore last night. Zach had gotten Black Bodies and Quantum Cats for his birthday and just finished reading it. He thought it was pretty good. She's on tour for her new book: The Physics of the Buffyverse. I was a bit reluctant to go, partly because of the weather and partly because of the hassle of either driving or taking the bus to Pioneer Square. If I gave in to my initial reluctance to go places I'd never leave the house, so I dismissed my desire to get a headstart on Sunday's International Pajama Day and agreed to go. Car or bus? Well, in order to have time for dinner, it just seemed less hassle to drive. So we did. Parking was involved; I drove. That means I got to choose the route which means getting on I5 at NE 50th where we merge onto the freeway from the right instead of Franz's (admittedly more logical) preference of 520 with the left entrance ramp onto I5.

Should have realised that things were not going our way when the NE 50th leg took forever and then was closed before the I5 exit for an accident investigation. Then NE 45th was a mess, but I figured that was just because of the closure of Ne 50th. I5 wasn't too bad, but when we got off the freeway and entered Pioneer Square the sign on the Sinking Ship garage read Event Parking $30. "Holy crap!" I said. "What's going on. The only thing that would warrant that would be the Seahawks." Franz said "Um, yeah, Seahawks. Didn't think of that. I think they are playing Dallas. Don't know if it's in town or not." Well, I think he had the answer right there. At this point you can pity my family, but I asserted my authority as driver and declared that I was not going to stress out over a futile parking spot hunt. I headed north on First Avenue and said if a spot appears I'll take it but otherwise we are heading home. Way up on Union there was an open garage with the sign Weekends and Evenings $4.00. Turned into it and was told they close in 10 minutes. Then why don't they take down the damn sign already. In the space of time it took me to turn around and exit, at least 6 other cars pulled in. So, no author lecture for us.

Coming back home via Montlake the U District congestion was explained as we intersected traffic leaving the UW Husky basketball game. Took a while before we got through, but at least it wasn't Husky Football where the cops would have diverted us a good mile north out of our way.

JRTFB

A year ago I was in two book discussion groups. Then I dropped both. One inadvertently (kept forgetting to go) and the other one after careful consideration. There's a painful story involved, but it's not my story, so not my pain to share.

In both cases, I have run into members around town and have been pleaded with to rejoin. Why? Because I'm the only one who regularly read the book and had anything of depth to say about it. They exaggerated, but not by much.

I've missed them. I'm probably forgetting how much the lack of discussion would irk me.

Tonight I will try again. Tonight I will attend the meeting of the inadvertently dropped group. We read Hitty: Her First Hundred Years by Rachel Field. Fascinating. Discussable (is that a word?).

The other group? No, I can't go back.